I have become discouraged, and I started taking Metformin, again.
I started exercising last week – some high intensity interval training (HIIT) or just walking as well as some basic resistance training (squats and planks, mostly). My hunger increased. I can’t leave for work now without packing half of the refrigerator in my bag, just to get through the day without becoming desperately hungry. I calculated what I’m eating and when left to my intuition and one rule (Eat Real Food) I eat about 2700 calories a day, about 50% fat, 25% protein, 25% carbs. It’s a lot of flippin food, but otherwise I feel like I’m starving. I’m unable to keep my blood sugar stable while eating carbs unless I just eat a ton of them, and if I do that my triglycerides are 500. I can’t tolerate too much fiber because of the endotoxin (serotonin?) problem, so a diet of low glycemic carbohydrates (beans, brown rice) is out. And somehow in the middle of this I’ve managed to gain weight in the last week. Bah.
I just have too much going on now. I can’t manage it all anymore. I can’t have marital difficulties, a socially demanding 6 year old, 1.5 jobs, and also be dealing with blood sugar swings all the time. Plus, my former relaxation time – my lunch break – is now being used for exercise.
I give up. Bring on the drugs.