Happy 2018

Things have gotten worse for my health.  For that reason, I’m going to re-commit to this bloggy.  I’ve missed writing but was embarrassed to come back and talk about what has been going on.  But what the hell – here I am.

I’m now a big fat diabetic.  I stopped testing my blood sugar for a while because I just couldn’t deal with myself.  I was being avoidant.  Well, I’m done with that.  My glucose is solidly in the diabetic stratosphere, and I have trouble bringing it down now.  About a week ago I tested it a couple hours after a high-carbohydrate meal and it was about 350.  Yes, 350.  (For those unfamiliar with blood sugar ranges, that’s big fat diabetic territory.  A normal fasting blood sugar is under 100, ideally under 90.  Normal for 2 hours post-postprandial – after a meal – is under 140.)  I tested again an hour later (so 3 hours after eating).  It was still over 300.  An hour later it was about 270.  I got on a treadmill to bring that shit down as fast as possible.  Wasn’t wearing the right shoes.  Fuck my shoes.  Wasn’t wearing the right bra.  Fuck my bra.

I better watch it or the google bots are going to classify this as a porn site.

35 minutes on the treadmill, tested again and it was under 200…and it dropped to under 150 over the next couple hours.

This shit scared the hell outa me.  I’m now one of those diabetics that is going to need insulin.  Or dialysis.  Or a prosthetic foot.

I have since committed to a different diet – one that has successfully brought my blood sugar down in the past.  Your average low-fat diet.  Nothing special.  No one to pay for their secrets.  No brand name.  Just stop eating so much damn dietary fat.  I test fasting glucose and postprandial glucose and typically make graphs out of the fasting numbers for simplicity.  I look forward to this graph in a couple months… My fasting glucose is was nearly 200 a few days ago, and since then has started to drop.

I should probably track what I eat but I don’t know if I have the energy for that.

I’ve also started doing yoga and walking.  I plan on working up to running.

This isn’t a New Years thing – the timing is purely coincidental.

My doctor increased my blood pressure medication at the end of December because it had climbed higher – over 180/95, while taking 2 medications to control it.  He also added a blood sugar medication but because I’m a shitty patient I decided not to take it and instead try to control blood sugar with lifestyle.

I’m going to blog daily about this so stay tuned if you’re interested in what I’m eating, how I’m exercising, and whether I still have both feet.

Side note…the law of attraction might be a thing…but ignoring health problems doesn’t make them go away.  It just doesn’t.

I won’t lie, it’s hard for me to put this out there.  I feel like a loser and a failure right now.  I’m sure someone is laughing at me and I’ll probably get a mean email from someone telling me I suck.  I accept that.  I’m putting this out into the world, not because I need it for accountability.  Believe me, I’ll never again need external motivation to work toward better health.  I’m hoping that I can help someone else in the same place as me.  I know it’s hard to know who to believe…so I’m going to take you on this journey with me.  And I’m going to be honest so you know you’re not alone.

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